First of all, huge congratulations to Hugh Freeze. I’m not sure any coach in college football history has overseen an offseason quite like the one Auburn just had, where the school has claimed seven new national titles to bring the total banner count in Jordan-Hare Stadium to… nine.

This is a messy thing that’s unique to college football, a sport that did not have an actual system to crown a singular national champion until 2014 – and even since we’ve had teams left out of the playoff able to claim legitimate titles. Critically, the NCAA itself does not award a national champion in the FBS, instead relying on “approved selectors” that all have their own methodologies. In the early years of the sport, this often resulted in up to five teams with recognized titles in the same year.

And what better team to keep a messy tradition alive than Auburn? In a world where we keep trying to sanitize and homogenize the sport until it ultimately becomes an official NFL minor league with a select number of schools, it’s nice to get a reminder that college football is still broken in some fun ways. More teams should do this, it’s not like anyone can take the banners away from you!

If you want to dig deeper, Jason Kirk at The Athletic has a nice review of how much merit each of the new title claims deserves. Your mileage may vary on the older ones, but the three most recent titles all pass the threshold of legitimacy. As a bonus, if you want to see just how insane it would be to try and award only one title for each season of college football, Jason did that too.

Listen to this:

Noted Crimson Tide fan and sometimes sports blogger Waxahatchee put out an absolute Album of the Year contender in March 2024, and we have not been able to stop listening to it since. Single Right Back to It with MJ Lenderman is the headliner, but the rest of the album is astoundingly perfect fall porch listening as well.

Eat this:

Whatever you think about The Bear and its latest season, you should absolutely try this recipe from the show’s ever-present side character/producer/culinary consultant Matty Matheson.

Thursday:

Missouri vs Central Arkansas

Hey! Central Arkansas gets to play on actual cable television! They have a cool field.

Friday:

Auburn at Baylor

Charismatic Baptists take on Footloose Baptists. This joke will make fans of both teams angry. Auburn winning would be a really good sign for Hugh Freeze, but a loss might crank the temperature on his seat up to an uncomfortable level of heat.

Saturday:

No. 1 Texas at No. 3 Ohio State

The long-held conspiracy theory that the AP poll juices rankings to give pretty numbers for TV matchups shouldn’t survive this game, which would have been a great excuse to give us the first-ever week 1 Game of the Century but we’ll have to settle for three top-ten matchups instead.

The boring synopsis is that both of these teams are making the playoff anyways, but that shouldn’t diminish our first real look at Arch Manning as he takes on the defending champs.

No. 24 Tennessee vs Syracuse

Big Orange vs. Regular Orange! Syracuse coach Fran Brown is a rising star in the sport, and he’s absolutely looking to cut a promo if he can knock off a still-reorganizing Tennessee team.

Mississippi State at Southern Miss

Good luck kickin’ it in Hattiesburg, Bulldogs.

Kentucky vs Toledo

This would be a really, really bad game to lose for Mike Stoops. Our first look at Zach Calzada reborn is the biggest point of interest in this one.

No. 8 Alabama at Florida State

There’s almost no scoreline that wouldn’t be funny. Visualize the ESPN “Alabama on the ropes against Florida State in 3rd quarter” push notification now, we’re so back.

No. 5 Georgia vs Marshall

Marshall won the Sun Belt last year, and subsequently vaporized its coach and half the roster to Hattiesburg. That’s not exactly confidence-inspiring heading to Sanford Stadium.

Arkansas vs Alabama A&M

Halftime show should be good.

No. 18 Oklahoma vs Illinois State

Scheduling an extremely respectable FCS opponent on week one of a make-or-break season with a totally imported roster is not a decision I would have made. The Sooners won’t lose, but chances of the entire fanbase leaving the first quarter nervous as hell seems like a good bet.

No. 15 Florida vs Long Island

Genuinely did not know that Long Island had a football team. Also, Florida is ranked no. 15? That feels aggressive!

No. 19 Texas A&M vs UTSA

This probably isn’t the frisky UTSA team of past years, and might be a great opportunity for A&M quarterback to make a case for the September Heisman.

Vanderbilt vs Charleston Southern

These teams have met just once, when the Commodores escaped with a 21-20 win in the morbid 2014 season.

No. 9 LSU at No. 4 Clemson

True banger of a matchup, until you remember that Brian Kelly teams usually show up to week one looking like they forgot how to play football. Then again, Clemson has made a habit of doing the same thing – punctuated by a 34-3 loss to Georgia last year.

No. 21 Ole Miss vs Georgia State

The Panthers collected one SEC pelt in 2024, but that no. 21 rankings feels really low for a Lane Kiffin team that might have a pretty good quarterback.

Sunday:

South Carolina vs Virginia Tech (Atlanta)

I’m so sorry but if I had to hear this mashup of college football’s beloved stadium anthems, then so do you.

Friday:

Georgia Tech at Colorado

Not only is this a fun matchup as the teams celebrate the anniversary of their split 1990 national title, but it’s between two genuinely interesting teams. Colorado without Travis Hunter (or Shedeur Sanders) is going to look very different in maybe a really fun way? Tech feels like the better team, but

Sunday:

No. 6 Notre Dame at No. 10 Miami

Carson Beck is still not to be trusted until proven otherwise.

The Shutdown Fullcast NIL ($) debuted with nearly two hours of lore about the modern Arkansas football program, and just the bit about Bobby Petrino’s motorcycle accident is worth the $4/month cover charge. No Laying Up’s Strapped, a marvel in budget-ish golf travel series, featured a lot of football in their trip to the heart of Texas. Phantom Island ($) asks the important questions, like did the events of September 11 cost Florida a shot at the 2001 national title? NPR’s Tiny Desk is a staple by now, but the Bad Bunny show over the summer was so so much fun. Friend of the Program Ben Weinrib compiled the best nicknames in Minor League Baseball over on the MLB homepage, and we’d love to see a college football edition next.