Editor’s Note: No SEC Quads this week, it’ll return soon.
WEEKLY PRESSER
A monologue.
In a micro-analysis of the emotional well-being of Gainesville, Florida fans should absolutely be upset. The Gators keep making the same dumb mistakes in year four of the Billy Napier era that stalled progress in his debut season. At a certain point, the bad penalties and turnovers don’t feel fixable, and it might just be time to move on.
In the macro, it’s fair to wonder if expectations for this regime were always a little bit out of whack. In the last 25 years, the Gators have only ever won an SEC title with a quarterback named Tim Tebow on the roster.
Granted, those two years also came with crystal hardware, but a quarter-century of national championship highs and 4-8 lows combined with a series of short-fuse coach firings doesn’t put the flagship school of maybe the most talent-rich state in the country as a competitor to Alabama and Georgia in today’s SEC, but rather a non-denominational Auburn.
Florida fans felt like the ones most victimized by the Sabanization of the conference, as all of our brains collectively broke into thinking that sustaining that level of success was not only possible but widely achievable. They had their own run with Urban Meyer that made those highs feel even more tantalizing, but then squandered that momentum with failed Saban assistants and Dan Mullen – who wasted the school’s built-in’ recruiting advantage by just not engaging with the process at a high level.
In the NIL landscape, it feels even less possible to build a dynasty in the Saban mold. And we’re getting closer to wondering if even trying to do so is holding programs back from even being playoff contenders.
It’s a long season, and Billy Napier already saved his job once by beating a highly-ranked LSU team. But if his hot seat is going to turn into anything other than a firing, that turnaround needs to start this weekend. Again.
TAILGATE
Consumables.
LISTEN:
I have a sometimes unhealthy fascination with covers. In the internet’s Limewire era, I would download entire playlists of (often completely misattributed) covers that ranged from delightfully weird genre mashups to really awful note-for-note recreations.
The best of these, or at least my favorites, are the songs that exist only in the moments unique to live performances – where you feel like the performers really own the lyrics, even though they aren’t their own. This Post Malone cover by Vampire Weekend fits my sweet spot of covers perfectly, and has lived rent free in my brain since I first saw the performance five years ago.
EAT:
Most aspiring home chefs are familiar with Samin Nosrat’s seminal book Salt Fat Acid Heat, and she’s continued to bang out really fun ideas at her blog a grain of salt. This End-of-Summer Marinated Bean Salad isn’t really a recipe, but more of a guide to creating a healthy meal out of whatever is left in the pantry. Give it a shot before the weather turns cool.
KICKOFF
The SEC slate for the week, previewed with exactly as many words as each game deserves.
Saturday Early
No. 13 Oklahoma at Temple
No, I don’t know why a school like Oklahoma is playing a road game in Philadelphia either.
No. 19 Alabama vs Wisconsin
Going to say this one more time, with emphasis: Kalen DeBoer isn’t getting fired this year. But I would not want to lose this game and put that theory to the test.
No. 24 Auburn vs South Alabama
Next week’s Auburn-Oklahoma matchup looks more and more interesting, but the Tigers need to avoid slipping up against the maybe-kinda feisty Jaguars in this Battle of Lower Alabama.
Saturday Afternoon
No. 15 Tennessee vs No. 6 Georgia
The Bulldogs have won eight in a row in this pseudo rivalry series, and 13 of the last 15, which is wild because it’s felt like the best running matchup in the (former) SEC East for some time now.
No. 25 Missouri vs Louisiana-Lafayette
No, I’m not calling them “Louisiana” and neither should you.
No. 7 Texas vs UTEP
Boise State’s weird couple of years makes it even stranger that Malachi Nelson, former top-five recruit in the same class as Arch Manning, couldn’t stick there as a starter after transferring from USC. Now at UTEP, this is at least an interesting opportunity to put his name back in the spotlight.
Mississippi State vs. Alcorn State
I hope both teams get fresh air and lots of exercise.
Saturday Evening
No. 17 Ole Miss vs Arkansas
The winner of this game will be the chic dark horse SEC contender for about three weeks, go ahead and make your “to make the playoff +600” bets now.
No. 3 LSU vs Florida
It’s a little weird that the spread is only a touchdown, right? Right?
No. 16 Texas A&M at No. 8 Notre Dame
Texas A&M totally fixed the defense last week and everything should be fine now, right? Right?
Kentucky vs Eastern Michigan
Yuck. Don’t watch this.
No. 11 South Carolina vs Vanderbilt
Extremely fun night game matchup between the former SEC East doormats. Stone cold lock that this game will feature one of the strangest touchdowns you’ve ever seen, and a 40+ yard LaNorris Sellers run.
INTERLUDE
Halftime show.
Not to be outdone by Mike Vick picking up his first win as a head coach, DeSean Jackson’s Delaware State Hornets beat Albany last weekend for his first victory at the program. Also, Morris Brown is one of Outkast’s most underrated songs.
THREADS
Interesting uniforms of the week. Inclusion does not always equal an endorsement.
Count me among the camp that believes Tulane’s dark green and blue is the best color combination in college football. Add in the now-ubiquitous Angry Wave logo, and this is on the short list of best primary uniforms any team can roll out.
OUT OF TOWN
More to watch.
Saturday Early
No. 12 Clemson at Georgia Tech
Big opportunity for the Yellow Jackets to insert themselves into the ACC contender conversation, and also for Dabo Swinney to make some convoluted postgame metaphor about Pontius Pilate and NIL or something.
Saturday Afternoon
No. 18 USF at No. 5 Miami (FL)
Surely extremely stable compund the University of Miami won’t fall into the same traps Florida did against the suddenly red-hot Bulls.
Saturday Evening
Duke at Tulane
Duke has Tulane’s old quarterback, but might be at a talent disadvantage at the other 21 positions on the field.
OFFERING PLATE
Praise be, we enjoyed these things, some of which require a subscription.
Spencer Hall at Channel 6 ($) has advice for fighting your children. No Laying Up continued their city golf destination series with a trip to one of my favorite mid-sized cities in the United States, Milwaukee. Shea Serrano continues his Good Movie series with a minute-by-minute rewatch of the extended panic attack that is Uncut Gems. Secret Base looks at the one legal way to goaltend a kick in college football.
